Over the last week it seems like a lot of exciting things have been happening. I posted my first blog on SEO (which is a mild indication I am progressing above novice and really starting to understand our users and audience – and that is super important if I am going to be successful in helping refine our product strategy), I attended my first search conference, and I got to spend a work-week in NYC (which for some reason always makes me thinking about the world in a much bigger way).
So here are some things I have learned about myself so far:
- I have no clue what my personal brand should be – I have so many broad interests and there isn’t really one thing I am great at doing (well other than my job of course – but even then a VP Engineering does so many things technical management, people management/hr, cross group communication, writing, strategy, sales help, etc).
- I need to make my goals more granular. Right now my goals are very grandiose, and even though I broken them down into chunks some of them are still a bit less actionable. I have a 5 year, 10 year, and longer plan – but at the same time I feel like I really need to break things down into smaller more attainable pieces.
- I suck at networking – in a big way. I learned a lot at the conference, went to lots of sessions, took notes, tried to tweet meaningful lessons and interesting thoughts; but I barely made any new connections. I am just so shy and have such a difficult time talking to people I don’t know – so I am going to read some books to help with those things.
- I really need to come up with better, comfortable clothes for traveling. On my flight to NY I was so impressed with how gorgeous the girls were dressed – in particular I absolutely loved the look of denim leggings with flat, slouchy boots and layered sheer tees and cardigans–so stylish. I totally wanted to go shopping and buy some of these awesome pieces while I was in NY, but I don’t think I will get the chance – perhaps when I am back in Seattle.
Ah yes, just a big list of my problems – well hopefully I will be able to figure out some great solutions and be able to say I have done something really great 
But for now, these are the things on my mind.
I have a big birthday coming up in <2 weeks. Like New Years and other “milestones” this one, too, has me thinking (a dangerous past time). Once again I am reflecting on my life – what I have accomplished, what I had hoped to accomplish by now, and also realizing what I was missing in my youth.
The age old saying “youth is wasted on the young” continues to echo throughout my mind as I keep coming back to the same thought(s): when I was younger I could have done anything; why did I spend my time partying/working for the man/dating losers/etc?
At this point, perhaps you, my lovely readers, want to know how I came to be in this so-called crisis–so let me elaborate.
Starting in January I started taking a pole dancing class (yes, the type of class that teaches you stripper moves). I have truly enjoyed it, since it combines athleticism, dancing, and being sexy — all 3 of which make me feel really great. In fact I enjoyed it so much I was wondering how to take it to the next level – maybe even get good enough I could perform (and more in a competition, than a day-, well actually night- since I already have a day-, job). After very little research it became quite apparent that I was kind of on the old-side to be pole-dancing in front of any type of audience. And then I had the thought “I wish I had tried this when I was younger (although not as a night-job as a sport)” and this made me realize – I am getting to the point in my life where there are goals that may not to make sense to pursue. I used to think I could do anything (still do actually), but now, some things just don’t seem to be “appropriate”.
And so besides realizing that my body just isn’t that of an 18-25 year old; I was also forced to face a version of what I once was (only better).
I was asked to meet with this young girl and talk to her about her career. As I sat across from her sipping my tea and listening to her describe her accomplishments and future goals and plans, I realized I used to be that girl. But somehow things slowed down. When I was 18, 21, 25, I had these lofty ambitious goals laid out for myself — I had 5 and 10 year plans. Yet somehow I managed to let them slip past me, and here I am, still accomplished, but far from where I had set out to be on my path (and unlike most people, I don’t have the excuse of children, etc).
Which brings me to a very open question – what now?
I am still not sure. I am definitely not the timid, introverted, insecure little girl trying to find happiness – in fact I wake up most days with the utmost thankfulness for all the happiness and blessings that surround my life. Yet, especially now, I still feel like I should have done more, accomplished more, achieved more, and I can’t help wondering why I didn’t realize all of this 10 years ago (hell, even 5 years ago).
So I am not sure what is next, but like every other year, and every other milestone that has crossed my path, I am going to set some goals and try and toil to achieve them. I guess only time will tell what will actually come next.
As a child everyone had things that wanted to be–some children wanted to be firefighters or police men, the ambitious ones wanted to be doctors or lawyers, so what did I want to be? A millionaire. Yes, as a child I dreamed of living in a mansion, having “staff”, and while I had no clue how to get there I knew that was what I wanted to achieve.
Why did I want to have so much money? Well part of it was influenced by Duck Tales (the cartoon)–I thought it was cool how Uncle Scrooge would dive into his gold coins and swim around (I am sure this would actually hurt a whole lot if you tried to do it in real life). The other main reason was that I grew up very poor and my single mother instilled in me that money would solve all the world’s problems (well at least our family’s). She would say that being “rich” was the key to life and happiness.
Of course as I have grown up my ambitions have changed and despite my mother’s best intentions I have developed my own value system. And just the other day I was thinking about how happy I am and how full my life has become. I wake up everyday and feel so lucky for all of the wonderful things I have in my life, and in that way I really am “rich” (however that wasn’t always the case).
Being rich is a state of mind, or a state of being, and you don’t need lots of money to get there. So how do you get there? Well, speaking from experience here are my best tips:
- Decide what being rich really means to you. This is the first step and for everyone it is different. I have friend who would be truly happy if she could buy designer clothing every season, and walk down the street in Louboutin shoes and a Balenciaga bag. I have another friend that just wants to have children and have the time to raise them. For me it is more about having fulfilling relationships, in particular one very fulfilling partnership (and this took me a while to realize since I used to really like expensive dinners out on the town, and now I would much prefer take out at home). Regardless of your dream, the first step is to really understand what *it* is that you are reaching towards.
- Take inventory of your situation. Look around you and make a list. What is going well, what is going poorly. Just like managing your finances, the first step is to take control of what you spend. Figure out what is missing from your current situation. For example, if you want to have children but are still single, you might be missing a partner (they aren’t necessary per se, but take it as an example). For me, I had lots of wonderful friends and I was happy with my career, but I was missing that special someone. Make a list of these things since they are the stepping stones to #1.
- Figure out what you can do to move in the right direction. Once you know what your missing and where you want to go the next step involves figuring out the necessary steps to get there. For me, this meant two things: being open to meeting new people, and continuing to improve who I was so when I met someone I had something great to offer. Of course if you goal is more designer clothes, then you may just need to skip your morning lattes, or perhaps start brown bagging your lunches. Either way come up with a plan. Write it down (when I put things on paper it just makes it that much more real), and put your plan somewhere you will see it everyday (my favorite place to tape up goals, plans and inspirational statements is my bathroom mirror–I am forced to look at them every morning as I get ready–essentially reinforcing whatever I am trying to do at that moment).
The most important thing, as with any self improvement project, is to actually take the time to be introspective and really think about these things. I like taking inventory on my life on a regular basis and am constantly redefining these things for myself.
In fact, maybe in a few years my goal to have a vault filled with gold deep enough to swim may just appear back on my own list.
There is a well known philosophy around time management that uses the analogy of filling up a beach bucket–it goes something like this:
First, put in the large big rocks
Second, the smaller rocks and pebbles
Then the sand
And finally, fill up the rest of the bucket with water.
You will end up with a very full bucket–much more full than if you had tried filling your bucket in a different order. The idea is to approach your time with the same way.
Take the really big important items and set aside time for those things first.
Then fill your time with other key tasks
The sand and water are the inevitable small everyday things that end up using up your day.
I have been trying to apply this to my time (since I often feel very busy–I rarely have time for lunch) to make sure that I am setting aside the time for the truly important things in my life (such as following my dreams, taking care of myself, and enjoying time with my friends and family), but also accomplishing the important tasks (especially some strategic work at my job); and not getting distracted with the hundreds of everyday things that come up (like running errands, handling urgent issues, paper work, phone calls, etc).
To do this I developed my own little system. Each month or every couple of months (monthly works well for me right now since my life seems fairly unpredictable a year or two from now) I lay out the important things I really want to do–such as take a weekend trip, schedule a family dinner, read a certain book, or perhaps attend a special event and assign deadlines to each one. And depending on the “task” I will even block off time or schedule them in advance. This is how I place my big rocks in the bucket. I track my rocks with an excel spreadsheet on my computer.
Then each week I lay out the key goals/tasks I want to accomplish this week. Typically I include a couple of “stretch” tasks and sometimes I do manage to complete all of them. These may be things like specific projects at work or at home, important meetings, or even things like workouts. I then try to assign deadlines and set aside time to get these done. These are my pebbles. I track these with a to do list on my phone.
And the sand and water? Well that is everything else that happens each day. I tend to write little tasks or reminders on post-its (particularly at the office) and sometimes at home too. Since these things tend to come up each day I don’t really have a long term track of these and for the most part these things don’t give me a big sense of accomplishment–but they sure do feel my bucket!
How do you stay organized and manage your time? My system seems to work alright for me and it does help me feel more productive overall, but I would say that I don’t have a good track record or mechanism for tracking these things further out. I think there is definitely room for improvement, what do you think?
Wow, I have been so busy.
It seems lately I have been keeping myself occupied and haven’t had any chance to post anything recently. So let’s see what have I been up to recently?
- Took a trip to NYC. We spent about 7 days there and even though I had to work during the weekdays it felt like a mini-vacation. It was very reinvigorating, despite tiring. I love the city. Mostly there was a lot of touristing around and seeing the sights. I got to see the Statue of Liberty, Coney Island, Central Park, and explored all the little neighborhoods. We also saw Guys and Dolls on Boradway (it is one of my favorite plays). It was soooo much fun. And despite all of the wonderful meals we ate I managed to lose weight. I think it was probably from all of the walking! Anyway, I will likely be going back there again next week for work.
- Working out! I have been back on the bandwagon with my work outs recently. I have been watching some TV Shows on demand (The Duel, The Hills, and several others) and I bought season 2 of Lipstick Jungle, so having a full programming schedule has kept my motivation up. Oh and I am seeing results! That has also been helping. Although I think the main reason for the results is that I have been improving my willpower and doing pretty well on my diets. And weight loss 20% exercise and 80% diet, and I have been having some success on both fronts.
- Reading. My new commute taking the bus has given me lots of time to read. I am on book 4 for the Stephanie Plum series. I read this epic thriller called Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follet–it is definitely more of a man book (mainly because of the graphic violence) but it was a good story and I read all 1000 pages in less than a week. I also read Water For Elephants, which was one of the best books I have read in a really long time. And my queue of books has been growing–Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell is next.
- Cultivating my inner domestic goddess. We planted a little garden (tomatoes, strawberries, snap peas, basil, a pepper plant) and I have been picking roses almost daily from our rose bushes so we have fresh flowers in the house (although my florist arranging needs some work). I also have embraced spring cleaning and completely reworked my whole closet–including ironing and making a big pile for the tailor (which hopefully will get taken care of this week). And (yes there is more!) I have been spending more time in the kitchen cooking and cleaning. I have been coming up with new recipes and trying to eat at home more frequently.
- Working! Of course! After all, I do work for a startup and I love what I do, but it certainly keeps me occupied.
I totally want to get a new camera so I can start putting some pictures on my blog–but being a budget prohibits that kind of spending so right now you will just have to settle for my stories.
Anyway, I am going to try to get back in the swing of updating more frequently, in particular I plan to post some of the recipes and things I am trying and how they turn out. I am also going to post some book reviews, and maybe some shopping links as they come about (I am hankering to tackle some redecorating projects in the house!).
Hope everyone is having a great spring
In my search to come up with passive income sources I have come across some skeptics. If you go to the Amazon web page for the The 4-Hour Workweek
there are tons of comments doubting the value of his passive income and outsourcing in the favor of traditional hard work. I also came across an article (from Awake at the Wheel) making the argument that this is not the way a person can really become “rich”. I was actually really impressed with the author’s thoughtful argument. In particular he had some great statistics I wanted to share:
“So, for those of you who aspire to fabulous wealth, here are some eye-opening facts about the richest 1% of people in the U.S….and how they got there. According to a recent SmartMoney report of The Harrison Group’s latest wealth survey:
- The number of pentamillionaires, people worth more than $5 million dollars (excluding home value), in the U.S. has quadrupled in 10 years to 930,000
- Only 10% inherited their wealth
- 70% of big-family fortunes are less than 13 years old…it’s mostly new money created by entrepreneurs.
- 80% started their own businesses or worked for a small-business that exploded.
- Most did not accumulate the bulk of their fortunes over time, but rather in a fairly short burst after years of hard work.
- Most of this new money is generated by risk-takers for whom “wealth is a byproduct of pursuing their passion.”
- For most, money was not much of a motivator. Solving a problem or improving on something that existed was.
- Only 10% of their wealth was attributed to passive investments.”
This got me thinking, how much is it worth to focus on passive income or would you be better off to just work very hard doing something you love? Passive income seems like a nice idea, and certainly people have had a lot of success, but it is true that even with lots of passive income sources it may never make you rich beyond your wildest dreams (whereas starting your own company certainly can if you dream big enough). To be honest I am not sure which approach is better; and I want to do both (of course I seem to always want to have my cake and eat it too).
I think the interesting thing is that even though I love money, I love solving problems more. Some people are the innovators (the ones that come up with new ideas), or the creators (the ones that like to build stuff), but I have always been more of a fixer (someone who fixes something broken). I think one of the reasons I find finance so interesting is ultimately to answer questions (although the risk part is a lot like gambling and I kind of like the whole risk-reward cycle).
Here is my plan: I am super committed to my current job at a startup, and I truly believe we will be really successful (and all signs are pointing to yes)–plus I am so proud of what we have built and accomplished I can’t imagine not seeing it through until the end. Even though I have very little spare time (I do work at a startup so I primarily live and breathe my job) I am going to work on thinking through some passive income sources (obviously the interest on my current savings, but also my new little iPhone application), and I am going to devote energy to my plan to start my own company (starting with my GMAT).
This is definitely some food for thought.
I have been doing lots of research this week–both in terms of reading information online and talking to resources close to me. Here are the relevant developments:
- The GMAT. I am going to start studying and preparing for the GMAT. I have been good at standardized tests in the past, but I am not even sure what the GMAT means now (I think it may even be computerized!). So I ordered a Kaplan test prep book to start preparing. I am not sure if I will apply to an MBA program this year, but I need to take the test to even consider it in the future, so I am going to take the first step. *BTW, the jury is still out on if I should get an MBA or not–most on this later as my studying and reflections progress…
- The iPhone. In my quest for passive income I have been trying to come up with some ideas on things I could build or create that could move forward on this goal. Garrett came up with the best idea of building an iPhone application. In addition to it being really cool and new, it is also a whole new platform for development. I am thinking of giving it away for free (since at least the first one will be pretty simple) and just asking for donations. Not sure how that will work, or if it will work, but it is a neat experiment and I am sure I can learn a lot along the way.
- Diet and Exercise. I have been doing well with the workouts (been watching the opening bell for the stock market every morning while I log my 45 minutes on the elliptical trainer), but still working on the diet part. However, I really feel like I am moving in the right direction (even though the scale has been stagnant).
- Talk to more people who work in finance. In my quest to learn about this as a potential career path I am going to make an effort to spend some time talking to people who work in the industry and understand what it would take to be successful (and more over, what it would take to even land such a position)
We will see how these things go. I will keep providing updates
In the interim I am thinking about this weekend. Besides spending time on my iPhone application I need to come up with some good picnic/bbq-esque side dishes for picky eaters. I have been obsessed with the heirloom caprese salad I learned to make in a Williams Sonoma cooking class (did you know they offer hour long cooking classes for free on an almost weekly basis?–this is a great idea on how to learn something neat for free–and they usually give you snacks too, which is like free food) last weekend, so I might make that on Saturday. I am trying to come up with some other ideas though–once I decide I will post the recipes I end up selecting
Over the weekend the NYT ran an article of The Debt Trap a series of video and articles about various people in America who have ended up victims of the credit crisis. It is shocking to hear the stories of these people and how they tried to get ahead and despite their best efforts they ended up losing their homes. These people are hardworking Americans who were given too much credit. The greediness and profits of the investment banks and credit card companies allowed these people to borrow more than they could afford. Banks charged fees on everything: late payments, over limit charges, and of course interest. Is it right to blame the banks? Should we really feel sorry for these people? People have consistently lived beyond their means only thinking about today, and the banks have taken advantage of that. In the forums there are people on both sides of the discussion. I think the scariest part about the whole thing is that the repercussions we are starting to see is just the beginning.
Mortgages was the first thing, but pretty soon people aren’t going to be making car payments and other debt payments. Loans are already harder to get, but I believe that increasingly loans are beginning to fail. The Seattle housing market which was initially strong compared to the rest of the country is starting to see massive increases in unsold inventory. Pretty soon, prices are going to start to fall as there is a shortage of qualified buyers and excess inventory. I have also felt like consumer spending must be decreasing. I was shopping online last week and I have started to notice far more items on sale–and things are deeply discounted (I found a pair of Kate Spade pumps for $78 on ShopBop.com which is basically unheard for the most part). It really makes me start to worry. We are starting to see the effects of increased fuel prices and the lack of credit.
There are lots of articles about inflation running rampant, and there is new legislation being proposed to help bail out the banks that made the bad loans (at the expense of tax payers)–will any of these actually have an effect and change the outcome? With inflation heading near 5% most workers won’t even see pay increases high enough to compensate for the increase in their cost of living. This are all kind of scary when you think about it. Especially when you consider so many Americans have been living largely on credit and have little to no savings.
So what can you do:
- Start saving. For many people this is a lot like trying to be on a diet, easy to say but often hard to do in practice. However, if you don’t have an emergency fund now is the time to start saving one. Just listen to the videos in the NYT article on debt–the young couple could have likely saved their home if they had 2-3 months of income put away.
- Decrease your spending. If you have credit cards and can’t control your compulsive spending then cut them up, or pour them in a bowl of water and freeze them so you don’t use them except in a dire emergency (by the time the ice defrosts you can decide how much you really need to make the purchase). You should always spend less than you earn. And try to live by the rule that if you can’t pay for something in cash (i.e. you don’t have the money in your bank account) then you shouldn’t spend the money.
- Get out of debt. If you owe money then come up with a payment plan. Sit down with your bills and accounts (or have someone sit down with you–I have done this for lots of my friends) and figure out a plan on how to get ahead. Starting with small steps and having a clear goal will give you a better chance at success.
The most important thing is: do not ignore your situation. Make sure you have a clear plan on what to do if you lose your job or something bad happens and you lose your income. If the economy continues to decline make sure you have a plan and an emergency fund.
I have been thinking (always a dangerous past time) about my blog recently and I realized that most of my entries are very disjoint and random. I write about things that I find interesting and things that I think might be useful for someone else. Although I am not sure if all of my chaotic writings are enough to really make this anything more than a glorified shrine to “all-things-Kate-finds-interesting.” Not that creating a shrine is a wasted endeavor, but I would like to think I could add a bit more focus.
I have decided to state the purpose of my blog and while I don’t plan on changing the topics I write about (since you have to write on things you find interesting) I am going to do a good job specifying categories so at least people can skip and skim to the areas that interest them; and perhaps eventually I will actually separate my content into more meaningful sections.
So what is the purpose of my blog? Originally I started writing because I thought I had things to say people would want to know (so if I had good content and put up ads I would have another source of income). Then I thought, I need to help evangelize my company and I should share my opinions on technical topics (but I don’t want to have any ads because this is really about just having an interesting online presence). But basically I have just created a lot of posts of which some people may find a few interesting. The thing is, I think I am pretty interesting and for the most part there is very little about me in this whole blog. So I am changing my focus a little bit. I am going to write about myself and my goals. I am going to use my little internet shrine as a means to track my goals. And ideally I am going to put some video content up (I work for a video company after all).
So this begs the question “What are my goals?”
- Get rich (while I have no desire to retire early I want to never, ever have to worry about money).
- Get in shape. Reach and maintain a body weight that makes me happy.
- Continue to learn and grow as a person.
How am I doing so far?
- Well I still watch every paycheck and pay a close eye to my budget. I grew up poor and my parents didn’t teach me much about managing money. When I first graduated from school and got a job I spent every penny I had (and even ones I didn’t–thanks to my credit cards). This meant that by my mid-twenties I was in debt (credit cards maxed out and living paycheck to paycheck). Thanks to budgets and changing my lifestyle (and an ex-boyfriend who made me actually sit down and address my bills and spending) I was able to change my financial status and start saving. I also became obsessed with all things finance, and one day I would love to move into that industry. I also left my corporate job about 2 years ago to join a startup. I hope to one day start my own company, and I thought it would be a way to see some of the upside of a startup without being completely on my own (and of course the biggest hurdle was less about risk–I thought I had no good ideas; now I come up with brilliant ideas almost weekly and if I wasn’t so committed to where I am at I would leave and pursue one of my own ideas). So needless to say I am hardly rich, but I feel like I have taken a few steps in the right direction.
- I was doing much better on this goal a month ago. I am a huge emotional eater and whenever I get stressed, happy, worried, bored, etc I look to food. Plus I have a crazy sweet tooth (my favorite food is buttercream frosting). My weight is currently 129.8 pounds but my goal weight is 115 pounds (I am 5’2″ so my weight is healthy, but I feel like I could be in better shape). I have tried most diets (atkins, zone meal delivery, south beach) but the only thing that works for me is not eating so much. I also find that when I am happier I eat less. Currently I am trying to work out 5 days a week and watch what I eat. I am also trying to be happier (since that seems to have the largest effect on my progress).
- This is probably the most ambiguous goal of the 3 (since I have clear financial goals, and an actual target weight). However this goal is probably the most important one. I am trying to read more (at least one book per month is my goal), I want to work towards pursuing my MBA, and finally I want to learn to be a better friend/partner/daughter/etc. I need to get more clarity around this and break it up into some distinct goals–but hopefully you get the idea.
I think some people may share these goals (at least a couple of them) but hopefully I will still have lots of great information and people will still find it interesting
I am an introvert. I like to contribute it to the fact I started my career as a geeky software developer, but the truth is I think I have been shy my whole life. I grew up reading books and while the other kids played on the playground I was content to sit in the classroom reading and writing–doing home work for fun (I know, I know, I was born dorky what can I say?). Over the years I have spent more energy than I would like to admit channeling my inner-extrovert. I have read books on how to make interesting conversation, how to hone my listening skills, and just how to communicate better in general. I have even taken 2 (about 5 years apart) public speaking classes (and both were whole semesters long!). Yet, still I would say I am very poor at delivering a presentation. I get nervous, I talk to fast, I read from my slides, I tremble, etc. This is problematic because when people look to you to represent a team and an organization–my lack of confidence in presenting falters the message I am trying to communicate. Needless to say I have realized I have to get much, much better at this if I want to be successful as an executive at a company (any company for that matter).
Besides needing to improve to help my career (and be a good advocate for my awesome team!) I am sure learning to present myself and communicate clearly can only help me in my personal life as well. So, as of today I have put together a plan for how I am going to work on building this skill. Here is what I plan to do:
- Attend at least one networking even per month and make at least 2 contacts. This may not seem like much, but I hate these things. I hate networking events more than any other things in the world. Why you might ask? I hate talking to people I don’t know. I have a hard time entering conversations and once I do I freeze up. Even though I can talk for hours and hours to my friends, put me in front of someone I don’t know and I sweat, fidget awkwardly, and look for every excuse to leave the conversation. This does not an executive make. I have to get better at small talk, and get to the point where I don’t have an anxiety attack when entering a conversation.
- Practice my power point presentations. On average I do about 1-3 of these a month. Despite the evils of powerpoint, it is still the primary means of presentation. Typically I have gone over my slides, and in my head I think through the talking points, sometimes I even write them in that little notes section of power point. However, I seldom do a dry run. I am going to make a point of practicing from my notes for the next few presentations I have to do to see if that helps.
- Read “The Articulate Executive“. My wonderful boss suggested this book to me (and you should *always* listen to “suggestions” from your managers) and I haven’t even cracked the cover. Therefore I am going to read this and post a review of it within the month.
Got other suggestions? Feel free to leave me a comment. I figure this will be a good start for now and I can see how much I improve in the next couple of months.
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